On being afraid and hating people…
Read an article this morning saying gas is going to be over $4 a gallon this summer. They say that is near the upper limit of what consumers will pay for fuel. Funny thing is that I think that article was written before another article I read, which was talking about how Iran just cut off oil exports to Great Britain and France. So maybe we won’t have to wait until summer to explore the upper limits of our ability or willingness to pay for oil. I don’t know much about economics, but I know a bit about people, and about myself, and that seems like a scary prospect.
I was sitting at the bar the other night between two girls, one from Brooklyn, the other from the west side of Chicago. Both of them have seen urban life in a way I can’t even imagine. They have experienced fear and hate just about every day of their lives- and yet there they were, sharing their experience with me. We got to talking about how fear and hate close off people who allow themselves to be run by those emotions. How can you fully experience life if you shut out the things and people you don’t understand, or the things and people you’re afraid of?
The more I think about it though, maybe that’s the point.
The world outside is so unimaginably scary- especially from the perspective of someone who’s only ever read about being truly poor, or about violence, or about being really afraid. It’s not a revolutionary idea, but it’s becoming more apparent to me. Fear and hatred are merely coping mechanisms - ways to deal with the crushing reality of the outside world.
Last night I was standing outside a fraternity house on the quad, and a guy (who was obviously very drunk) wearing the letters of a fraternity other than my own shouted at me. He asserted that my fraternity “sucks.” The expectation of the people gathered on the porch was that I would react in kind, perhaps asserting that in reality it was his fraternity that sucked. We live in a time when a calm and peaceful reaction (which was the route I went with) is somehow out of the ordinary. By remaining calm, and asking the people around me to remain calm, I did something that wasn’t strange to me, but it was unexpected to others.
What do I accomplish by reacting to hatred with hatred? Would my assertion that his affiliation, race, creed, orientation, or any other identifying feature is somehow less acceptable than my own bring me to some kind of solace? I can’t really say because I didn’t do that.
This is not to say that I have never said things in anger or hatred, or that I am somehow morally superior. What I do realize now is that in spite of the fear that this world, or situations that challenge our beliefs generate, we have the opportunity to take a different path.
I don’t believe it’s foolish or unreasonably idealistic to stand by the idea that treating people with respect and dignity can be accomplished, and that it can yield incredible results. Just because the world outside is frightening, or unknown, or because fear and anger are the status quo does not mean that we are bound to those principles in our own dealings.
So in closing, and in the sobriety that Sunday morning and two cups of (really good) coffee bring- Sig Ep does not suck, and $4 a gallon gas will not lead us all to ruin. Even if thinking and saying those things is just a coping mechanism too, I’ll take peace and optimism over hate and fear.




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